Custard's Last Stand is an episode of Sparks Nevada, Marshal on Mars.
- Sparks Nevada - Marc Evan Jackson
- Croach the Tracker - Mark Gagliardi
- Gork - Craig Cackowski
- Folksy Hal (Narrator) - Hal Lublin
- Ginny West - Janet Varney
- The Gelato Stand - Jonathan Coulton
- Aver-E - Donal Logue
- Iron Ron - Ben McKenzie
Gork enters The Gelato Stand, where Sparks and Ginny have already met for their date. Croach is at another table, enjoying a very large Gelato. Ginny tells Sparks that while she was away on business last week, she read Rebecca Rose Rushmore's book about herself and Sparks. She tells Sparks that Rebecca misunderstood emotional unavailability and blamed Sparks for her own projections, which causes Sparks to say "I love you", and then retract it, saying that though it's on the table for later, it's a long table. They hold hands by the end.
Croach interjects, saying that he and The Red Plains Rider are in a stable relationship. Croach says that Sparks and Ginny will soon give way to the human mating ritual. Sparks says that what they're doing is a little bit of a big deal to him, Ginny and Croach agree that it's a big deal. Croach thinks Sparks and Ginny's relationship would be nearly as satisfying as his own and Red's. Ginny and Sparks agree there's no need to go faster, or slower, in their relationship.
Two robots, Aver-E and Iron Ron enter, with their human daughter, looking for their other partner, Gork. Aver-E and Ron ask Gork to help comfort their crying daughter, who lulls her to sleep.
Ginny is extremely curious about why three robots have a human baby, but Sparks tries to tell her that he's clocked out of marshaling, and as Gork is the sheriff and a robot, he couldn't possibly be doing anything illegal. He attempts to steer Ginny to re-focus on their date and tells her he's clocked out of his job.
Iron Ron asks Gork why he's eating Gelato, since he has no taste buds nor digestion tract. Aver-E explains that Gork is stress eating, because he's worried that because of his job he won't always be there for their baby. Gork says some days that's all he can think about.
Ginny again asks Sparks how he can see all that and not wonder what's going on. Sparks begins to tell Ginny about how Mercy Laredo hated robots, but Croach tells him not to talk about past courtships. Sparks asks Ginny about her past relationships, and she begins to wonder if they're actually compatible because he seems to have no curiosity. Sparks says it's okay if they have differences.
Sparks asks where Croach's girlfriend is, and Croach says she often leaves with no warning or word when she'll be back, and it doesn't bother him because he trusts Red. Sparks says it's not about trust, it's about communication. Ginny's wrist computer dings and she says she just scanned Gork, and she noticed he's having emotions. She says she needs to perform a mandatory procedure, then asks Sparks to trust her.
Aver-E and Iron Ron admire their baby, then Ron and Gork tell Aver-E that he smiles like their daughter when he's in sleep mode, even though they're not related. They're a family since they're raising the baby together. Gork says he never knew he could feel, but now he knows he can feel.
Sparks tells Ginny that he used to not be able to clock out, but she needs to learn if she wants their relationship to work, which is what he wants, and Croach agrees. Ginny then says that her manual says that she needs to hard reboot Gork, and tells him to hold still. Ginny says she doesn't want any trouble either. They begin to stand off, but Sparks defuses the situation as Croach gets more peach gelato.
Ginny says she needs to do defuse the situation, and does something to Gork. The other robots draw on Ginny, but Gork tells them to stand down, she did nothing. Ginny says she transmitted her scan to the Troubleshooter database and upgraded the records saying that X2981 robots can have stable emotions and should not be rebooted.
Sparks tells Ginny that he's not mad about what she did, but needs to communicate better, he would have had her back. Ginny responds that she thought he knew better the type of person that he was. Sparks says he doesn't know yet, but today she went a long way to showing him who she is, and he really likes who she is, even if they're still learning. Ginny agrees that she likes him a lot too, and they share their first kiss.
At the end of the kiss, Sparks exclaims "Bagropa!"
- Throughout the episode, Mark Gagliardi was pantomiming eating a giant gelato cone, then finishes one before requesting the peach gelato, then begins again. He also offers Ginny some of his Gelato several times.
- This episode was filmed and the video released as a reward to Kickstarter backers along with several other videos.
- This is the 190th episode of The Thrilling Adventure Hour.
- The previous episode is Beyond Belief - Scream a Little Scream, with the ad Bucatino Business #4 in between.
- The next episode is Christmas on Jupiter, which contains a Sparks Nevada, Marshal on Mars episode but is out of continuity.
- The previous episode in Sparks Nevada, Marshal on Mars canon is The Night We Never Met (TAH #188).
- The next episode in Sparks Nevada, Marshal on Mars canon is Cosmic Sans (TAH #193).
This episode was recorded at The Bell House on October 11, 2014 and released on December 1st, 2014.