If you're haunted, or haunting,
and find yourself wanting
an aid for what ails you or howls in the dark
If the fires of perdition are starting to singe,
If it's spirits you seek or vampiric revenge,
If the witch that bewitched you is coming unhinged
There's a penthouse way up high above the city,
Where martinis run to dry amidst the wailing and the witty…
Is a nameless something stirring in the walls or in the air?
Is a lamentation luring one to sorrow and despair?
Are there screws to be unturned?
Are there spells to be unlearned?
Or werewolves to be dewormed with eloquence and savoir-faire?
Let the spirit world beware, let them cower and recoil
From the rarified and rare elegant and debonair
Devil-may-or-may-not-care, raise your glasses in the air for
the two and only Frank and Sadie Doyle!
The hosts with the mosts ghosts!