John Steelhands is a character in Sparks Nevada, Marshal on Mars.


John Steelhands was a robot outlaw on Mars in the pre-podcast era. He melted the polar ice caps, which were being used as a prison for other robot outlaws. When the ice caps were melted, the resulting flood threatened both a human settlement and a tribe of Martians, who were enjoying a feast in honor of their younglings who had survived the trials of B’ar-mit zvah.

Sparks Nevada, along with his horse Mercury, rode alongside the flood. Sparks attached a wormhole generator to his lasso, and sucked the entire flood into the wormhole. Presumably, Sparks Nevada captured or killed Steelhands, but this is not outright stated in the podcast.

To repay the onus incurred by the tribe for being saved by Sparks, Barlok the Wise assigned Croach the Tracker to help track Sparks Nevada's "metal enemies" (robots).


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